Kacie’s Kinship: An Introduction

January 13, 2012 by Kacie Riann

According to the U.S. Census Bureau, over the last 25 years, the number of children being raised by someone other than a parent has increased dramatically, with the vast majority of these children being raised by their grandparents. Between 1990 and 1998, the number of families in grandparent-headed households without either parent present increased by 53 percent, and the 2000 Census placed the total number of children living in a grandparent- or other relative-headed household at 6 million. — From “Grandparents as Parents” on adoption.com

A short history of how my nuclear family became a kinship family:

My parents got married in 1985, my dad had one son, Mason*, from a previous marriage
Mom and Dad had my older sister, Jenna, on December 3 of that same year
Exactly four years and four days later, I was born on December 7, 1989
On December 10, 2004, my half-brother and his girlfriend Daisy* gave birth to my oldest nephew, Jesse
On May 15, 2007, Mason and Daisy had their second son, Hunter
On August 8, 2009, their third son, and my third nephew, Matthew was born
On December 12, 2009, my parents got a phone call from Child Protective Services alerting them that with Mason incarcerated and Daisy in the hospital recovering from an overdose on opiates, the boys needed immediate placement in a safe home.
On December 13, 2009, Jesse (5), Hunter (2.5) and Matty (4 months) moved in to my parents house with nothing but the clothes on their back.
On January 12, 2012, the boys are still living with my parents who are in the process of formally adopting them. Mason is still in contact with my dad, but not his children, and Daisy is completely out of contact with the family.

*names have been changed

Now, this is my family:

L/R: My Sister (Auntie Jenna) with her dog Hugo, Jesse (7), My Dad (Grandpa), Matty (2), My Mom (Grandma), Hunter (4), and Me (Auntie Kacie) with my parents dog, Stellaluna - Photo Taken in July 2011

I had no idea what a kinship family was until I was a part of one. I was shocked when I first learned that over 35,000 people in Washington State are raising a relative’s child. I remember having one friend growing up who lived with her aunt, but statistics say that 5.7% of children in Washington State are raised by their relatives.

This is not something that my family is going through alone, and that is why I started this blog. I want to raise awareness to this common family structure as well as provide a community for other unique families – whether they be a kinship or not – to feel NORMAL.

The goal with this blog is not to gush about the adorable things that my nephews do (although I’m sure that will come up), but to provide an honest, thorough picture of the ups and downs of my family life. I hope you can relate, because no family is 100% normal, or perfect.

Okay, so I told you about me and my family, now I’d love to hear about yours. What makes your family unique?

–Kacie Riann

13 Responses

on January 13, 2012 at 4:40 am | Reply charityvictoria

I like how you summarized the timeline with bullets–it tells us what we need to know but is almost shocking in its bluntness/presentation.
Now show me more photos of those adorable little boys! 😉
- on January 13, 2012 at 5:01 am | Reply Kacie's Kinship
  
  Trust me… MANY adorable photos to come… I have to pace myself or that will be the entirety of the blog!
on January 13, 2012 at 5:27 am | Reply Finch

I am also a fan of the timeline/bullets business.

In answer to your question: my family is really only unique because my family is made up of weird people. And we keep in touch with our way-way-way extended family. But that’s about all…
on January 13, 2012 at 12:08 pm | Reply ursusinterruptus

What an excellent blog topic! I think I’m a touch envious of you. n__n

Overall, the blog has a clean look. I also really like the inclusion of those clever bullets that act as the hook for your first post. And what an adorable picture! Where was that taken? If you don’t mind sharing, of course.
on January 13, 2012 at 4:27 pm | Reply Jenna

I don’t mind sharing! That picture was taken at our cabin on Lake Chelan. When Kacie references “com[ing] from an even more beautiful town in North Central Washington”, this is what she’s talking about. We’re pretty lucky 🙂
on January 14, 2012 at 12:05 am | Reply Liminal Passages

I think you’ve done a great job of writing concisely about a huge issue. I agree that the format you’ve chosen for this is a great way to keep the reader’s attention while relaying a lot of information at once. Your picture is great, and gives the reader a warming look at your family.
That having been said, I think it’s great that you’re writing about this. I know several people who are either raising relatives’ children or who are assisting in the raising of them–I’ve learned that “it takes a village” is NOT an exaggeration! 🙂
on January 14, 2012 at 12:15 am | Reply Erin

I love this Kac! I have a decently “mixed family” so I’ll go 🙂
-My parents go married and then adopted my sister in 1986 after finding out they couldn’t have children
-Adopted me in 1990
-Divorced with I was five and my mom remarried in 2007
-From the marriage I gained my step dad, a step brother and a step-sister-in-law, and a step sister
-I found my birth mother in August 2010 and met her, her husband, my half brother and three half sisters
-My step brother and his wife had a baby in June of this year adding a niece into the mix 🙂
-My sister just got married in September 2011 to my great brother-in-law
-And I’m pretty close with part of my god family constantly calling my god-nieces my nieces and such

Keep posting I’m exciting to read more!! Especially since I can’t believe Jesse is SEVEN!
- on January 14, 2012 at 8:10 pm | Reply Kacie's Kinship
  
  Holy Crap Erin,
  It really has been a while since we talked! I had NO IDEA you met your birth mom/her family. I’d love to hear about it.
  
  Yes, Jesse is huge. It’s scary how fast that happened. Jenna and I were there when Matty, the youngest was born, and it’s scary how quickly he has become a walking talking terrible 2.5 year old! I was only in Prague for 4.5 months and it seemed like all three of them aged a year in that time.
  
  Thanks for reading =] It’s always good to hear from you.
  -Kacie
on January 19, 2012 at 1:08 am | Reply Brenda Miller

I agree with the others that this first post really sets us up nicely for what’s to come. You might consider, after a few posts, making this its own page (like the “about the family” page) so we can have it as a reference. (maybe “about kinship families” with links, etc.)
- on January 19, 2012 at 1:42 am | Reply Kacie's Kinship
  
  an About Kinships page is definitely a good idea! I will look into that!
on January 19, 2012 at 1:09 am | Reply Brenda Miller

P.S.: My family is boring: two parents who have been married almost 60 years, an older brother and a younger brother (I’m the sensitive “middle child”); three nieces and one nephew (who has just finished training to be a Navy seal. Now that might add some excitement!)
on February 19, 2012 at 2:48 pm | Reply Grandparents As Parents Share~Mindful Parenting Tip: Children Need To Feel That They Belong

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